One conversation at a time

For those of you who may have missed it: I’ve been spending a lot of time focusing on a little project called Don’t Lose Your Grip.

And you may be wondering why. Well of course it has to do with the amazing people involved and how much they inspire me, way more than they could ever really know. And of course the project itself is brilliant and going to save lives, literally! So why wouldn’t I want to be involved?

But there’s a ‘but’… the passion and the drive is great but the emotions involved are slightly more complicated. I’m not going to pretend that I’m fine and that none of this fazes me, because it really does. Yes, this project is centred on Lacey but she is not the only person I’ve known who has been affected by depression and those thoughts of loneliness or feeling completely overwhelmed. Unfortunately I have known people throughout my life who’ve had trouble reaching out or even worse: thought they were reaching out but no one cared, simply because the people in their lives did not quite understand exactly what they were talking about.

Even last night I was talking to a young woman who has been aged beyond her years by the challenges of life. It’s so strange to see how fragile life is and how we are on this endless see-saw of emotions and one simple ripple can through us of balance. So for some reason, she came to me. I’ve only known her for 3weeks… that is all. Yet, somehow we feel connected, it’s like age doesn’t matter. Like our very different lives are all null-in-void and in this hectic world of emotions we’ve been levelled by common fears and doubts.

So there we were: half drank cold coffee next to the couch that we went to sit on 4 hours earlier just listening and talking and crying and not worried about how the other is going to see us in the morning. All of this might seem futile to you but I can tell you that in that moment the rest of the world did not exist anymore and we were, well, free. It’s odd that she came to me with a problem, willing to be completely vulnerable and as a result we both got to experience that human contact we seem to be losing in the 21st century.

You’re probable regretting the fact that you started to read this because it’s just a rambling stream of thoughts but let me just say one thing: we are human because feel. If you take away the feelings, however uncomfortable they may be, you take away our humanity. It really is that simple. If I could subscribe a friend to all of you, just one single person who’d be willing to connect and talk and fight and cry and feel with you, then the world would make a whole lot more sense. When did we become those people who would rather be guarded and never let anyone in for fear of them using our deepest secrets against us? Oh wait, I remember that one time you told the person you trusted most in the entire world that one thing you’ve never told anyone else and they tried to use it against you… Yeah, I’ve been there! And I won’t pretend that it hasn’t scarred me, because it really has!

But one thing I’m teaching myself again is that it was one person who crushed me, not all of them. Yes, others hurt me at different times but still, I can’t hold the rest of humanity responsible for their actions. I don’t have to completely trust the person who hurt me, I don’t even have to allow them back into my life but if I shut everyone else out too, I’ll be cutting my nose of to spite my face! If I didn’t let anyone else in, I would be missing out on some of the greatest relationships in my life!

So I guess all I’m saying is that we need a little more faith in humanity… a little more trust in that connection and an open mind accompanied by an open heart.

AM

BTW if you’ve ever lost someone to suicide or depression or simply know someone who needs a reminder that they are perfect regardless of the worlds messed up standards, join Don’t Lose Your Grip. Let’s change the world one conversation at a time.

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